Saturday, June 11, 2011

Jokes: Children Are Quick

My school superintendent (Head of School) at Maharishi School just sent the teachers a fun and supportive end-of-year email. He closed with a series of jokes that had been emailed to him from a friend.

He said to share them with others, so here they are!

Children Are Quick 

TEACHER:    Maria, go to the map and find North America  . 
MARIA:         Here it  is. 
TEACHER:   Correct.  Now class, who discovered America ? 
CLASS:         Maria. 

TEACHER:   John, why are you doing your math multiplication on the floor? 
JOHN:          You told me to do it without using tables. 

TEACHER:  Glenn, how do you spell 'crocodile?' 
GLENN:      K-R-O-K-O-D-I-A-L' 
TEACHER:  No, that's wrong 
GLENN:       Maybe it is wrong, but you asked me how I spell it..   

(I  Love this child) 

TEACHER:   Donald, what is the chemical formula for water? 
DONALD:     H I J K L M N O. 
TEACHER:   What are you talking about? 
DONALD:    Yesterday you said it's H to O.   

TEACHER:   Winnie, name one important thing we have today that we didn't have ten years ago. 
WINNIE:       Me! 

TEACHER:   Glen, why do you always get so dirty? 
GLEN:          Well, I'm a lot closer to the ground than you are.   

TEACHER:     Millie, give me a sentence starting with 'I.' 
MILLIE:         I  is...
TEACHER:     No, Millie..... Always say, 'I am.' 
MILLIE:         All right...  'I am the ninth letter of the alphabet.'     

TEACHER:    George Washington not only chopped down his father's cherry tree, but also admitted it.  Now, Louie, do you know why his father didn't punish him? 
LOUIS:           Because George still had the axe in his hand....     

TEACHER:    Now, Simon, tell me frankly, do you say prayers before eating? 
SIMON:         No, sir, I don't have to; my mom is a good cook.   

TEACHER:        Clyde, your composition on 'My Dog' is exactly the same as your brother's... Did you copy his? 
CLYDE  :         No, sir. It's the same dog.    

(I want to adopt this kid!!!) 


TEACHER:    Harold, what do you call a person who keeps on talking when people are no longer interested? 
HAROLD:     A teacher 

And as a closing remark, for that last joke, I have to say "Ouch!"


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